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Funnies? (well, you decide...)

A Sunday School teacher tried to communicate that Jesus is always with us, even though we can’t see Him. One four-year-old claimed to understand the concept. He said, “I know who he is. He’s the one who opens the doors at Tesco’s!”

The minister was sick and a neighbour, noted for his never-ending sermons, agreed to take the service. Finding only ten worshippers present he later complained to
the beadle; “That was a very small turnout, weren’t they informed that I was coming?”.
“No” replied the beadle, “but word must have leaked out”

A recently ordained minister ran up the pulpit steps to conduct his first service. Soon he found such an event no mean feat and was reduced to a quivering wreck by the end of the service. By the skin of his teeth he made it back to the vestry at the end of the
end of the service. The beadle remarked to a nearby elder, “Aye, if he’d gone up the way he cam’ doon, he would have cam’ doon the way he went up"

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